'fingered' and 'feelings' NEVER belong in the same sentence.
video games are the ultimate cock blocker
dude. how can brian from family drink at fucking bars? he's a dog and definitaly doesn't have pockets.
They were so big her bra clasped in the front. Didn't even know those existed.
I wouldn't call that a crush. It was more of a minor brain aneurism.
Full disclosure. I fucked the fatty from work and shit is weird now.
She invited me to Bikini Yoga with her friends. Sounds promising.
i dont know the whole gay terminator look is really hot on him
When I am this hungover I become increasingly grateful for having my own private office
Then you fell out of your chair, looked right at me and said, "You are sooo drunk."
I mean I'm completely serious and also drunk.
What a great combination.
Im about to get an ultrasound of my balls. I hate waiting. Its the worst.
I. Love. Skype. Sex.
I think it's just been too long since actual dick has been inside you that you only THINK you love skype sex
Just saw a girl I banged wearing a pro life shirt downtown. Not sure where to start with that.
So, I can officially cross "getting eaten out in a church confession booth" off my bucket list.
Randomize
