you just love her because she lets you bang her with fruits and veggies!
I puked in the cab and in my hair and he didnt even know
Just burped. Tasted like beer and cherios...Beerios. This is gonna be quite a day.
girl I've been sleeping with this summer as per her request just gave me a carton of cigs to thank me for my "hospitality". this is good.
I wanna throw up and cum in that order
And they were awkwardly all over each other in a Christian way.
Found a piece of twizzler in my buttcrack.
Do you still have "be bumpin" written on your ass in glitter pen? Who brings a glitter pen to a bar? Or pulls there ass out for that matter...
He made me brush his hair afterwards because it made him feel like a ken Barbie.
God I hope the sex was good.
Also I found and fixed my beer gun.
He's a prodigy! It would be a service to the scientific community.
15 is 15
My sinuses still burn from snorting red wine last night.
Drinking wine while working. Yay.
Just had sex at the YMCA.
We are so productive today.
We're just starting to open presents and I already need a shot. This is gonna be a long Christmas day.
When I found out he was circumcised I called his mother and thanked her
Randomize
