Bitch is talking to much, howd u ever get her 2 shut up?
It's worth it.
How worth it?
Back door worth it
If I could text you the sound of me vomming, I would.
I may or may not have melted a dent into the top of my minifridge with my hot glue gun, which I left on for the past couple hours unsupervised, while we were on our salvo/savers excursion. Welcome to Halloween in college.
I just saw a van full of amish parents and their kids. Those cheating mother fuckers!
I've been practicing for you. Including stockpiling medical supplies for curing hangovers.
you think that next time i come over to do this you can pick up the condom wrappers you used on the other girls
I'm just going to eat until there's an actual reason why he wouldn't want to fuck me.
We took it as we must go to waffle house or else we will upset the gods.
There are so many things that would come back to haunt me if I ran for President someday.
like that video of you mad stoned vomiting in the bdubs parking lot after going to a pizza buffet screaming how you needed to make room for froyo
Wat
She stopped laughing and kind of stared at the wall for a while. Then she did 3 somersaults and said she saw jesus. This weed is fucking fantastic.
No more morning sex. Just for once, my vagina would like to go to work bone-dry and bone-free.
Like don't initiate a threesome when we're all watching SPONGEBOB. That's like sacrilege.
too bad we didn't bet. my 38-1 tears would have made great lubrication for a blow job.
My throat is burning
Thats because you proceeded to drink the salsa because you thought it was alcohol...dumbass
I just hooked up with the German exchange student who doesn't speak English. And you said I have no talent.
Randomize
