That was rough. We had a 50% puke rate and 100% still drunk rate at lunch
When my kids ask how I lost my virginity Im going to have to tell them of a mythical thing called "Myspace" and how strangers could lure you into their "den of love" thanks to clever quotes and graphics
right as i was about to introduce them she goes "old fuck buddy, meet new fuck buddy."
i think i left my bra at your place
It's still hanging from my ceiling fan. Please let me keep it there.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
reaaaally cool. my cat ate my birth control.
hey. so did i get tied up by a jumprope last night?
Her roomates have been scoring her hookups. I got 8.9, best of the week!
my mom was by far the drunkest one there. best impromptu wednesday afternoon party ever
Someone younger than me just got married. Send help and vodka
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Watching a bear prancing around in a tiara is worth a loss of bar time.
Yeah. I'm so over work, that I'm not even satisfied pretending to work anymore. I just flat out want to go home. Fuck this job
If the smell of things stopped me from putting things in my mouth. I wouldn't be popular with Grindr guys.
Btw I'm playing passed out so you can get laid but obviously you need to take the offense just ask him if he wants to go to bed and leave a cigg on the counter
Woke up from a black out in a strangers Jeep without phone, shoes, or wallet.
Goat in kitchen.....explanation?....
Randomize