Crying babies in a bar. Really?
And she just changed the baby's diaper on the table. It's killing the beer garden.
Bisexual people are plain selfish.
Yeah, that's not really a good thing. Especially for a girl. You should get a tattoo on your stomach that says "Please wear a condom".
It was unlikely that the relationship was going to end with anything other than antibiotics.
I'm talking like I woke up and her bra was spinning around caught on my ceiling fan
I prob couldn't even get his attention if I had a dick growing out of my forehead
Showerbowl immediately followed by pullups naked. I feel like fucking Tarzan
You were in subway at 3am showing everyone your tan lines
High moment. Almost just passed the blunt to the dog.
Dougie got over his pride nerves. Found him dancing on a float wearing nothing but rainbow boxers.
Turns out he's actually a she. Might keep dating her just to see Mom's reaction.
WHAT KIND OF DEALER ONLY WORKS FRI-SUN???
Ours, apparently.
We're going to get naked and build a fort instead. HAPPY NEW YEAR!
There's a bull to ride and dancing on the bar is encouraged. This is my heaven. And this is why god made leopard tube tops.
Thanks for being my best friend so I can use you as an alibi to my family while I'm out getting some dick in my face.
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