That's why you don't touch shit after fingering somebone
i almost got kicked out of the rave because i was trying to get in on some couple's makeout sessions
can you pick up eggs and chocolate sauce on your way home?
what kind of party is this?
the best kind ever
I just delivered a ham and cheese to a strip club. you were right this job is not that bad
Giving me the bigger bowl of ramen isn't considered "romantic"
I'm sweating so much right now i look like Whitney Houston
Makin mac and cheese without you. Definitely seem to do this better inside you. Splashed boiling water on my cock
You know when you meet a penis that looks like it was made out of all your hopes and dreams?
I just got three pairs of underwear free and a bathing suit for $20 by modeling them and letting the salesman grope me a bit.
It's great being a young gay man in Chicago!
Your mother may get texts again about women putting dog food up their vaginas and asking for it to be licked.
It's all fun and games until you rupture a testicle
Update: the condoms are expired and Canadians are NOT to be trusted!
At what point in a new hookup do you tell the guy you need to wear a mouth guard when you sleepover because of your TMJ? Asking for a friend.
It was all going good until I realized she was wearing underwear with a butt flap. Mission aborted.
That 2-CB was ass.
You mean the asprin cut with pez?
Randomize