I'm at a bar that has girls so awful looking even you would not have sex with them.
Well... I doubt that.
just landed in detroit. Currently holding a bag of my own vomit. neighbor told me it was the most graceful vom she has ever seen. Kicking off bar exam week in style.
just walked into the room and her sister said loudly, "do him, or I will."
She had to leave early so she could get ready for her high school's homecoming. I hope her date likes sloppy seconds.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Normally I would go for him, but there's just way too much vodka under the bridge for that
Just got caught staring at a woman breast feeding. My only response was, "She's so adorable".
Oh god I just realized bird face had che Guevara tattooed on her upper arm. Deals off, readivised opinion
Is it acceptable to have my intern get me pedialite and plan b?
It's a learning experience. She can add to her resume that she cured her bosses hangover and poor decisions
I bruised my dick hopping over that fence last night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
A stripper just invited me to her daughter's birthday. Where did my life go wrong?
Now that I'm sober, I'm realizing you put your name in my phone as "wowww"
What the matter? A girl can't play some Super Mario without being accused of being high?
I know he’s a bad decision but he's casual, his penis is amazing and his technique is on point.
He has great stamina, he knows how to use his tongue, and he's hung like a goddamn Pegasus. I can overlook the man bun.
he had a bulletproof vest and a pocket full of lollipops! how was i suppose to say no.
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