ok shes still asleep, should i pee on her and say she did it herself? and by the time you respond to this ill probably have already made the decision
ah, there's nothing like waking up to picture messages of a strange man's cock. life is good.
haha, that's fucked up. flacid cock pictures are the mental breakfast of champions.
and that's why he's hiding in the taco suit
May or may not be going home with my jamitor. i'm kiddong, btw, i have no idea. i'll let you know soooon.
Around noon tomorrow come looking for me. I'll be on Mill wearing whatever clothes I haven't lost yet. DO NOT REPLY. DO NOT ASK QUESTIONS. JUST DO IT.
I'm 25 and she is 19. She wants to practice blowjobs on me because of my stamina. Not only does the GI bill pay for me to go to school I am teaching a freshman blowjob course. I love Texas.
You gave me your shirt to use as a napkin every time I spilled beer on myself. Before we went to the bar.
We tried to make ramen in a glass bowl on the stove. They called facilities to pick the glass out of the door
He keeps texting me videos of fish swimming in his fish tank, so I think it's safe to say he's back on weed.
I just sat watching friends in the bathtub by candlelight...nights like this make me wonder if I ever want to be in a relationship again
Do you ever look at someone's Snapchat story and think ‘you told me you would eat my ass’?
I woke up and found that i was using my computer as a pillow. i had 53 pages of random letters on Microsoft word
Lol, maybe a little bit. I don't know. I don't keep a super keen memory log of dicks honestly.
He was talking about his friends deceased ferret and I still managed to orgasm.
Now THAT is dedication!
Ok. Yes. He has a tiny penis. But he also has a trust fund.
Randomize
