There's something fitting about a hot in-car interracial makeout to the tune of 'healing the world.' RIP Mike.
You tired to make Beefaroni in the Mr. Coffee machine.
There are so many things that would come back to haunt me if I ran for President someday.
like that video of you mad stoned vomiting in the bdubs parking lot after going to a pizza buffet screaming how you needed to make room for froyo
Wat
I'll be home next weekend. Its mothers day. Let's party just enough so we are frightened it might be our first
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
When our dicks touched he made a lightsaber noise.
hes that one kid that offered to spoon after staring at me for 5 minutes
I told him I was going to sit on his face after I got out of the shower, he threw up the arm boners and yelled "STEVE HOLT!!" I might actually stop sleeping with other dudes.
You know the sex was good when he had to ask which way was north before he left.
So the revenge porn my ex posted just resulted in a contract with a gay porn company. I'm going to make $8,000 this weekend. That would a breakup checkmate. Are you joining me in the legislative committee hearing tomorrow?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well you know I have tits so that's half the battle
I just said "I love my cat" as a hobby.
I smell like playdoh, sex, and ruined lives. I love the weekend
He came over and fucked me while my conference call was on mute. Working from home is the best.
He's a drill sergeant! The sadomasochist in me can't resist that.
i woke up between my boyfriend and his sister and i don't know if we fucked or cried together
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