Remember that sex scene from American Psycho?
Ya, why?
We should try that some time.
Something clean will definitely be barfed on tomorrow.
just because you dressed up as a brontosaurus doesn't mean you can poop in my yard and roar at my neighbors
based on the size of her vibrator, i'm going to be a huge disappointment
I think i found piece of your tooth in my dick this morning when i took a shower
I'm drinking rum and coke straight from the 2 liter bottle.
Actually, considering the facts that I am wearing a duct tape dress and eating a gas station quesadilla, I am pretty good.
And dont forget my 23rd birthday where with no underwear i crawled through the cage of the police car. Dont get drunk be fore you get drunk.
Dude, this is like the 4th time today I've had to use cruise control for a 25mph zone. This hangover is never fucking gonna end.
he had me stop mid-blow job to make me use my phone to id a song on the radio..
i wasnt really sure how to responde to that.
And then we were riding the keg in the pool like an 8 second rodeo...naked.
Haha, maybe if he wasn't dressed up like Kimmy Gibler he could give her the D
A warmed up burrito and jelly beans. The breakfast of champions.
...blackout vacation is awesome. Where did you end up? I think i'm in Miami.
Hospital.
the sex is SO much better when he thinks im going insane
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