Omg. Budweiser tramp-stamp sighting @ Wal-mart. Best tattoo EVAR.
considering i was high when my dad made me pee in the cup i might fail this one
i go for whatevers easier....i'm bisexual strictly due to the convenience factor
I'm pretty sure we got the cab driver deported
announcing that you were the mayor of bjtown got their attention.
I told him he was a man of science and that he should conduct experiments on my tits to see how they stay up. I need you to hold onto my larynx when I'm drunk.
Seriously, I'm making a calendar and marking off the days with little penis's
Also I just had a flash back ... He told me I have nice nipples and then asked me about yours..
Seriously. Come back. I've had two beers for breakfast so far. The third will be for lunch since it's already 12.
i decided if i had to, i could survive with only 3 fingers on each hand.
for me, it's working out the tricky timing of the Viagra and nightly laxative.
He tried to buy me a drink at dollar beer night. All 3 of his credit cards were declined, so he asked me if I could cover it. Needless to say, I'm not calling him back.
IN OTHER NEWS did you guys see Orlando Bloom's penis today? I did
I woke up and finished the bottle like a champ
HE CHOSE A RESTAURANT AND MADE A FUCKING RESERVATION. I AM SHOOK
Randomize
