Holy shit I just stopped short on route 18 because I thought my gps was saying I had to turn right in 11 feet. After almost hitting the guardrail I realized I had to turn in 11 miles.
Fuck I'm high.
it went kinda like vodka, childhood memories, screaming/cursing, fist fight, tears, broken shit, passing out. in that order. tis the season.
Today in psych we learned that you are a whore.
Me specifically?
Yep.
Dude... You bled on his hand... At this point it doesn't matter that you called him your exes name, seriously.
obviously he has no clue about college dating. it goes drunken sex then the 1st date
We are not buying weed off a guy from the internet.
Best part of failing a semester of college: not having to buy books next semester. I can drink to that
I'm about to initiate a game of drunk UNO.
Drunk UNO has officially been banned from now until forever.
I tripped while walking across the stage and while trying to pick my diploma back up my flask fell out in front of the dean
ditto.
about cumming, not toast
High. As. Fuck. I thought the kid next to me didn't have an arm for like 2 hours.
Hahahaha I'm glad you woke me up with this text.
went to class still drunk this morning and my professor made the class give me a round of applause and said, "see people, THIS is inspirational... if she can make it to class in this condition there is no excuse not to show up!"
And pointless. I'm fully vested in all my calories coming from booze today. The salad just fucks that shit up
woke up hungover this morning lying in a water raft covered in water.. i dont know if i should consider this good or bad
i really didnt think i was that drunk last night but the txts from unknwn #s that say i like your lace panties are def telling me otherwise
Randomize
