you really need to stop walk of shaming home from theme parties.
when I woke up I found a half-eaten cherry toaster strudel sandwich with bacon in the middle.
we went to the store to buy cookie dough and conditionally went straight towards the booze
at which point I apparently ran in and shouted "I made the sex with that one!"
I have no idea how to attract men with my personality anymore. He can't see my tits via facebook chat
all i know is that each time we woke up we were at a different chinese restaurant. help.
She started puking and I started running and I swear to god there was a wave of vomit chasing me down the stairs.
"Let's chug a beer then make out" doesn't sound as nice, but it would prob make him cum right there.
My life is a joke. Told everyone last night that they could call me Mrs. McCormick because I'm gonna end up alone with a handle of peach vodka anyways.
He always finds the good stuff. He's like a truffle pig for bud.
My last google search is "how to build a flamethrower"
Are there any plans to where i might need to be dressed semi-nicely or is it a "pants optional" weekend?
I'm cooling my balls with a beer because I'm too cheap to turn on the AC
Idk I saw a cheetah print onesie and it reminded me of your Lion King fantasy.
We need to stop smoking. I just ran into a glass door.
Randomize
