Believe it's possible to jerk off while watching the food network.
I'm drinking margaritas out of a soup mug, of course I'm going to get wasted
he told me he once ran a blackmarket liquor store out of his house. thats all it took for me to go home with him
She put baby oil on her toes and i am not legally allowed to talk about what happened
Dude, smoked out of a pumpkin tonight. I like Halloween more now
IDK but this explains my bloody dashboard.
The couch is in the bathroom. I don't understand how that is even possible. I couldnt even fit that shelf thingy through the door. Come help. I am about to pee my pants.
All I want is for every tall lanky young guy who is reading in a Starbucks to go balls deep in me. That's all.
I drew a nude short fat middle aged woman today and liked it
It was honestly one of my favorite days in art class except for the 20 min she faced me and kept looking at me and we made eye contact
So like, boobs.
are you really going to start every conversation like that?
I can always pull a half day at work too. My boss makes exceptions for drug use. Lol. I fucking love my job.
pretty sure I woke up to him jacking himself off IN MY BED
She doesn't even give a fuck about angle. I seriously gotta start doing like penis yoga or something.
I already popped my bottle of Rose and took my boxers off. No can do muchacho
Dude come over...were drunk and I'm holding a T-shirt gun and discovered beer cans are the same size as rolled shirts.
Randomize
