Her bacne/racne was so bad it was like having sex with bubble wrap.
All I remember is drinking vodka out of tupperware.
My fight-or-flight response is really more fight-or-fuck
i dont know, i woke up and he was going down on me. i guess i can save his number
knew it was a bad idea. the look she gave me when i left her roommates bedroom in the morning really illustrated that.
Dude it started out with let's find some food and ended up with me getting a needle in the face
Question: would asking the hot guy from the grocery store to "beer me" his number be a poor decision?
I've given up for the day already. I just wanna eat cheesecake and hide from her.
I may have tried to encourage people to play a new game I invented last night. I called it Super Quarters. Like regular quarters, only using an AA medallion.
NO HOOKUPS IN THE CAR. I will try as i might to practice what i preach, but there are no guarantees.
Dude, you were tagged in a stripper FB selfie. That is a whole new level of something.....
Everyone thinks it's an okay idea now until I'm overdoing it on the vodka/clubs, dancing on a table, trying to make out with the groom.
And then the night went full on bisexual.
Come on in. I'm butt naked, in the kitchen, eating ice pops
I don’t care that he’s a decade younger. He’s cute and I need a good penising
Randomize
