i kinda want to bang the mythbusters girl... i bet she's got a nice snapper
Do you think the new Crest Whitestrips Advance Seal would stay on while I give him head? It would be great to knock out 2 things at once...
Put your dick on his face to wake him up, dont worry its fine.
im going to live freely with my legs opened and my heart closed
we just ordered 30 dollars worth of french fries...whats wrong with us?
i woke up next to the toilet with a chipped tooth, somebody elses shirt on, and a random guys id in my pocket
wanna go with us to feed the ducks bread soaked in vodka?
how could i say no?
I'm thinking I had intended to send you pics cuz I woke up naked
He snuck out of bed at 9 am and came back with pizza and a bottle of wine. I think I'm in love!
His tongue was like Jesus himself was blessing my boobs for eternal ecstasy.
I'm not so sure Jesus approves of such activities, but ok.
If this were a real emergency kilted men wielding claymores and riding giant badgers would hve rescued said Guinness. So clearly this is just a hypothetical
You invented a drink at the bar and named it Boner Soup. It was like an even trashier version of a long island iced tea
yeah I had to wear a fucking diaper from work home so I didn't get the shitty squirts all over my cars seats it was fucked
Do you know how hard it is to have sex on an air matress while there are people sleeping in the same room?!?!?
Just confirming I will be washing my asshole at your house at approximately 2:45 tomorrow afternoon.
The strangest confirmation message ever sent.
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