I wanna bring you to show and tell
Once again you get dinner and all I get is semen on my leg
i wonder what thom yorke's orgasms sound like
I come up with the best drinking games while babysitting
She keeps stunt undies in her bag, 2 sizes too small. She leaves them behind so the guy thinks he was luckier than he was...
I decided to buy a keg of Miller Lite instead of paying the electric bill. Just thought I'd give you a heads up...
your dad made us margaritas and breakfast on the morning. I think it's safe to say he relives his glory days through us
walking around pouring bird seed on passed out guys in the quad.
After they flagged you, you hid in a bathroom stall and text me to bring you more shots. That kind of drunk.
We are there now. They have a giant cock and balls with an eagles face and wings.
I can only only sleep there on nights I orgasm cause he snores so loud and if he leaves me hanging one more time ill probably cut off his dick from lack of sleep and frustration
You will bone me until my eyeballs fall out. This is not a request.
Dude I am a waste of space, I just febreezed myself so I could go out and get lunch
I have two choices: tits or tacos. I just can't decide.
I just threw up in front of a bunch of parents/prospective students while they were on a campus tour..awesome..
Randomize
