it was the worst sex ever in the history of sex. i mean ever. and he thought he was great. actually told me he was the best id ever had...what was i supposed to say? lol...i've had better times by myself. seriously.
Buying weed on Christmas. Gotta love Jewish drug dealers
I took it to a new level. I'm procrastinating taking my adderall. Hate finals week.
...She then said get into the spirit and started making firecracker noises while having sex
i love you. like a brother. a brother that i had sex with more than once.
you started putting condoms on anything with a point, then you were yelling at the lamp for using your last condom...
he does have a point though, watching you drink makes me never want to drink again
My vagina is not really on board with my "emotional issues"
I miss my brother. He would have fucked the fat girl for me.
I told you I would
I wouldnt do that to you. You're my actual friend
I got kicked out of the bar for suggesting that the bartender drop her tits into my Redbull instead of the usual liquor
Found your counterpart from cali. Walked into the bar we were in with milk and a donut, ordered a beer and said anything his group wanted was on his tab....dangerous
Sware then you fell into me doing a Tarzan swing thing and my margherita spilled and shattered all over this guy and sice you were on the ground you tried to pull it off by twerking on the floor lmfao
After sending me a dick pic, he asked, "yay or nay?"
you can tell a lot about a person by the quality of their porn
remember that party we went to sophomore year where we found that girl and had the orgy? Im totally at that house right now.
Randomize
