Holy wow, I found all the old poems u wrote me back when we were in looooooooove...just sort of wild to look back on, thought u'd like that
dude did u upper deck my toilet?
haha like two months ago
i cleaned the bathroom like ten times before i realized what the smell was.....i hate u
My little brother has some high school girls in my pool, it's like a jailbait buffet in my backyard
We're like two naked peas in a sex pod.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can hear my fat mexican neighbor yelling "do you like that!" ...I hope its not his dog
Fuck. That. I'm gonna get drunker and make them regret they EVER put me at the kids table. I'm a MAN.
I went back up to the apartment to get her phone and when I came back she was peeing on the sidewalk
If a Romanian girl's marriage isn't considered legal in the US then she's fair game right?
I could end up kidnapped. Or worse, the night will be really awkward.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The girl behind me in psych just tapped me on my shoulder to tell me there was a condom wrapper in my hood.
Basically as long as the fan is pointed at my vagina i can cool off enough to sleep.
I realize that my conversation topics seem to only be about bees and my cross dressing fiance. Thank you for being my friend.
I'll pick u up. I have to buy a new sofa cover anyway. I swear I've never seem a girl cum like that before.
I am no longer and illegal Moonshiner. I just made thousands of gallons of incredibly High test alcohol with police watching and waiting for thare couple of jugs so that they can bring home and disinfect their houses with it. I'm fat with money at the moment.
My vagina likes him more than I do, but I’m going to follow her lead and see what happens
Randomize