I totally ignored my nose and drank sour milk this morning. The tupid carton said 4/22/09. i puked everywhere..
i'm not a human right now. not even a dancer.
I told him I had my daily dose of vitamin c so i wouldn't blow him
she had a pic of herself in a bikini as the wallpaper on her iPhone... I'm sensing a Tyra banks kinda girl. shit.
It's not called being bisexual its called making out with anyone that has a mouth
So the "just a friend" kid confessed his love for me...sometimes I hate how awesome I am.
I think I get why guys like boobs so much. I just motorboated myself and it's fun. My boobs feel soft and squishy on my face.
i robbed the continental breakfast last night
It's like the last supper of drinking before the summer ends
I bet. I bought a surfboard and a kite and filled my camelback with vodka-tonics. Let's do this
Just had a heart to heart with my John Belushi poster.
I woke up and found cookies in my purse. It's a 12/12/12 miracle.
Just got high and apologized to my vagina for getting chlamydia
He's in the same dorm as me. We are sharing a laundry room, gym, and cafeteria. I'VE ALREADY COMMITTED DORMCEST AND MOVE-IN DAY ISN'T UNTILL NEXT WEEK!!!!
All I fucking want right now is a cheeseburger the size of my face
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