I figured girls wouldn't be down to sleep w/ a guy who plugged a pregnant chick
So how was he last night?
Five-minute foot-long.
Then she called me a home wrecking whore.
dont they live in a condo? that doesnt count.
Day 3. Will have to postpone job hunting by a month. May have blown out my knee. Was sunburned on Friday. Now look painted red. Still alive. All worth it.
It was one of those "I have no idea if this will ever happen again so I can't say no" opprotunities. Part of me was like, "You slut" and the bigger part was screaming, "Hell yeah"
I can't believe we had "50th anniversary of man in space" sex.
Drunk me thinks I can light up a cig anywhere, sober me finds this hilarious and highly irresponsible. The grocery store is not a bar.
He probably has his cowboy hat on, that's his house hat.
I think online classes were designed around the concept of day drinking.
Sex on roller skates
Floating mattress
Tie
U offered to motor boat her and it somehow turned into u two going on a sunset cruise in Newport. At 3am.
These welts and bruises from letting gay boys whip my thighs last night are a clear indication i should lay off the tequila.
I used my yoga mat as a door stop so he couldn't come into my room when i was sleeping last night. Drunk engineering at its finest
I just ate broccoli before drinking. Does that make me a responsible adult?
She put her coat on went to leave and called me an asshole. I responded with "I never said I wasn't" and then she pounced on me like a cat on cat nip.
Randomize
