I never thought I'd hear the words "aww you pulled out" and "you're so sweet" in the same sentence.
I drowning out her crying with songs from the Beatles it's good for us both. She relives her 30s and i dont have to hear her cry
Sitting next to a retarded hot married man on the plane, I got 6.5 hrs to homewreck this shit.
my brother is about to go smoke a joint outside... he's preparing his munchies on the counter beforehand. I admire his responsibility.
And then she was like, "don't do anything. No blow jobs, don't let him stick his fingers in weird places because people have germs."
Nope. Can't afford girlfriends. Still looking for the 25 year old bisexual tripled who owns a brewery or a casino.. the search continues....
I understand where he's coming from but I don't want this alcohol to revolve around relationship
Wait
Take off that red sweater and wear my vagina as a facemask.
These welts and bruises from letting gay boys whip my thighs last night are a clear indication i should lay off the tequila.
Haha he puts me in a mood mix of annoyed and... "just get in my pants"
My stripper pole led lights flash with the sound so it's awsome with music
Maybe they'll dismiss me from jury duty after they smell beer on me. You can't keep me in a cage and then give me an hour and a half long lunch break next to a beer fest and expect sobriety.
He gave me an orgasim so fantastic that I had an asthma attack.
I'm soaking her vibrators in tabasco and wasabi paste. "furious" is an understatement
my dad just liked my status about my bowl being stolen even he feels my pain
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