being a part time student has turned me into a full time alcoholic.
It was odd. His friends dick tasted the same as his. Friends are beginning to have to much in common
I thought you'd have died of alcohol poisoning years ago! How'd you get my number?
whatever. as long as im no longer referred to as the girl who fucked the pledge on his big brother's couch.
Well if were past the bullshitting stage yes if not then no I'm not that kind of guy
dude, i woke up with a mini keg on my night stand. again. like wtf
The chick I hooked up with last night is my girlfriend older sister. Who is in town visiting. Who I just met. Who I just had dinner With. Who is here along with their parents and the whole family. How did my luck get so bad?
just letting you know, you took a hit of the blunt while sleeping. happy birthday
This girl just swallowed a pealed banana whole. I'm not worthy.
Im cutting you off tonight ONE boy at a time
The narcoleptic neighbor conked out while taking her dog out again. Drinking game based on what the dog does and how long she's out. You in?
Wanna have a sleepover and take me to court in the morning?
Hope you are okay. You were running down the street with shopping cart at one point and yelling "bitches aint shit!"
Do you remember vividly describing the shape and girth of my cock to that girl last night?
Happiness is laying in bed, topless, pouring 4 packs of hot sauce on your taco bell.
Randomize
