Call me Kermit cause I'm about to go piggin
So I had sex with him again. He's still got it. Not chlamydia, he got rid of that.
You're perfectly engineered for doggy style
The things that come out of my body both amaze and disturb me.
let me put this in terms we both understand. he was the crunchwrap supreme of men--the perfect combo of all things manly, gooey and delicious. and ready for instant enjoyment.
Of course my walk of shame coincided with the alumni marathon on campus. But, I did get a thumbs up from the woman handing out water.
I just quit my job so I could get dick this weekend. I'm pretty sure my need for dick is much more important than the customers' needs.
My heart feels like a grape in a barrel about to be crushed into wine
That's what jaeger bombs out of teacups will do to you.
When you're not at your house I assumed you're somewhere having sex
We fucked so hard and loud that the everyone at the party downstairs starting chanting his name. Oh I we broke a lamp.
I've lost every trace of self esteem. Even sneaking a BJ in the coffee room has lost it's luster.
I'm drinking apple juice and champagne while watching crossroads..like the classy bitch that i am.
like, there were so many other better not terrible choices you could have made, so i'm honestly baffled that you managed to fuck up that bad
It's next to that place that has cock fighting.
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