Now hope fervently that she'll do it quick and cheap, just the way i like it
ppl dont tell me stories about anal. apparently im not a tell-me-stories-about-anal kind of person
its 4th on my favorites list. 1. butt sex 2. mini skirts 3. three meat pizza rolls 4. fuck the pain away by peaches
At least I'm doing lines with a notecard. That counts for something right
I've friend zoned this boy hard. I made him change my nipple rings before he went home.
Excuse me while I download incredibly disturbing porn until I'm more ashamed of myself than of my country.
I'm just trying my hardest not to get addicted to drugs or pregnant and all your other friends are out there getting married
I wish my nipples were as well behaved as yours.
Talked to the dude for a hour . I now know where he lives, his occupation, his goals, his dreams and what his dick looks like.
You know you gave a quality blow job when you have to ice your neck and jaw the next day.
Your bf is wearing nothing but a cape, I mean absolutely NOTHING but a cape. I know you said he looks like Thor but this is getting a bit ridiculous.
I will feel awake by 6 pm
Are we not meeting until 6?
No I'm just saying thats usually when my body knows it's time to party
I watched a compilation video today of a guy banging his sex doll to edm music. I just had to tell someone.
I was taking a nap and she comes in wo/ pants, gets up on the bed and mounts my face while watching Weeds on Netflix. I'm okay with it, but at least let me wake up first.
Also: I hate her so much. She's out at hooters, making spelling errors, while I'm literally sitting at a clinic getting std tested. Which of us won the morality award in this break up.
Randomize
