You screamed 'pound me, you big thick stud.' I looked around for porn cameras.
Shut up. I did not.
I really wish I was making that up.
we need to go to the store. i'm tired of having bud light for breakfast.
do you want me to pick up budweiser instead?
the chair was smiling at me in sociology and i had to try not to burst out laughing.
Dude, we totally smoked up inside a church organ last night. Add this to the epic list.
It's sad really how 5 am brings with it a distinction from drunken to pathetic.
Funny how often beer equates to second degree burns on some portion of my body.
I left puerto rico a week ago and my vagina still smells like coconut.
Confidence is key. All I had to tell him is I'm drinking a bottle of wine and eating chocolate today to celebrate that I love myself. That's how you get a Valentine, my friend.
So coach him. No guy wants to admit being unsure of something in bed. It's a man-law or something.
also I woke up naked and covered in water but nobody can explain that part.
I really want to fuck that guy in the full wind breaker suit
He added his name to my To Do list. That's the way to my Type A heart.
Just had a VERY VIVID visualization of wrapping a pizza around my cock and fucking its brains out. Soooooo less weed more dates?
I was in line at Panera when I got the pic you sent to your coworker. I just showed your vag to a soccer mom. The vibrator was a nice touch.
I don't know what it is about this quarantine, but I have never written this much smutty fanfic in my life and I am loving it!
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