she's leaving w me bro, I've been buying her mad shots. She's seen my apt. So locked down.
You do realize the lyrics aren't "hold me close TONY DANZA" right?
You can't be serious.
Is it wrong to beat off to a girl to determine if you like her or not?
I just had human shit waiting for me at the top of the escalator at Bowery. This is truly the Lord's day.
May the Lord look upon you in favor and give you pees.
Wow, this guy is harder to get rid of than gum in pubic hair
so let's talk penis.
Post-sex chicken soup was such a good idea. It's been like an hour and I'm still applauding myself
I don't know what you're talking about. I just drank beer out of my own bellybutton by doing a backbend and letting it run down my body.
You hopped on the counter after puking, and told us you were wearing bare feet and didn't want to be alone.
We stayed up until 4:20 AM. The next thing I remember was waking up at 4 PM, like my internal alarm clock knew.
I'm like a number 27.2 on a scale of 1-10 of how badly I want you right now.
Your lack of a response brings it down to a 25.4.
He could only go twice. I need a guy with more stamina and is less married
Jk probs not coming. Tequila
just the thought of you slurpin down noodles really rustles my jimmy
you suck at sexting
When we were fucking he called me by his moms name then after we were done told me to call him. He's not receiving a call... What if his mom picks up?
Randomize
