i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
Ikea night.
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Insert tab A into swedish slot B
I owe all of my success to double stuf oreos and weed.
an ex called crying about her current BF. convo ended in phone sex. i love emotional wrecks
Girl just texted me a pic of her boobs with the caption "don't think I'm a whore"
please remember that your boobs are bigger than your sisters. when you borrow her shirts they stretch and then shes left flapping in the breeze. dont borrow her clothes anymore. love dad.
When sleeping with someone new: should you hide the magnum condoms, or let him know what he has to live up to?
He bought me a pink rose and a Plan B. I really like this guy.
Bro, there is a rent-a-cop selling syringes out of the trunk of his car. This is why I hate the DMV.
I'm in Starbucks carrying the boxes wine and the hubcap. So many judging looks.
My condoms might be a little big for you but hey, a big sweater is better than no sweater at all when it's cold right?
I came to the party for him. I don't know where he went, but I mentioned being hungry and his housemate brought me a huge tupperware container of berry cobbler. I think I'll stay.
We're going to ride the bus of mixed signals all the way to unrequited love town and that's where I'm going to live my life and then die.
2015 is the year I FINALLY ALMOST had enough dick to satisfy me.
I mean, I've had her boob in my mouth, but is that romance?
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