Please advise as to how precisely ashamed I should be if I just became sexually aroused by a Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince preview
Dude I'm so glad we're not friends anymore. It would have made fucking your stepmom last night really awkward. Dickwad.
Just taught my suite how to queef. I feel like i'm back in 9th grade!
We hadn't had sex in so long that I started queefing and then I couldn't stop giggling... I think he's mad.
Oh, and thanks to you. I'm now stuck in the living room, held hostage, listening to my roommate's "How I discovered I was bi" story. FUCK YOU.
Hahaha wear something that says i'm here to party but wont go farther then a handjob.
I feel like we shud celebrate your sisters homecoming by having sex in her room
She face-timed me on the toilet. My dick is never going to recover from that.
I'm in the power napping at parties stage of my life
Your stories are the best. I feel like you're a spy among the heteros. It's not fair.
Yeah, but he has adorable dimples and dimples talk me into things.
He was just lying in his underwear like a present. I had to unwrap it.
Figured out how to triple bathroom speed at #lollapalooza.. Girl squats, guy 1 goes between her, guy 2 uses urinal. Your welcome.
I gave myself a charlie horse masturbating this morning. I feel like that really set the tone for the day.
Still fucking the ballerina?
She can put her legs behind her head.
Enough said
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