I'm gonna start referring to my vag as my ladygarden
I need to talk to you about an important matter involving lesbians.
Turns out shot glasses hold the perfect serving of sour patch kids....I still fail to see how not having any real glasses is an issue
Wednesday. Otherwise known, to you at least, as "there are two gay men in my bed" day.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I woke up to the sound of a beer can being opened. I love him already
she demanded that I make her breakfast too so im in the bathroom cooking bacon with her straightener
So apparently we dropped beers outside the apartment last night, and someone RETURNED them! Ha like what? I just walked out the front door to Christmas in a box on my doorstep.
I threw up sweet potatoes. Worst thing to throw up ever. They came back mashed.
I dont know about you but I'm not getting out of bed this summer for anything but food or sex
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hey my results were negative. Your chlamydia train stops here. Happy hunting!
I SHIT YOU NOT a mailman helped me leave without waking him up.
Dumb decision of the night...walking home drunk and smelling my pepper spray
He managed to find a wheel chair and a super mario hat, now hes rolling around screaming "real life mario kart!"
Just saw a hotel with a bunch of mattresses in the parking lot. Made me think of you.
It smells like graded cheese and febreze in the family room what the hell have you been up to???
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