can we get nightvision for the apartment?
Do you know of any times in scooby doo when the monster turned out to be a real monster? You know not just a person?
Can you really blame Steve Phillips? He went to Michigan. Plowing fat girls is a 100-level course there.
there is a school bus full of santas parked in front of the liquor store
she said she was living bicuriously through me.
Just got back from fathers day breakfast. So hungover i couldn't eat so i just slipped my food in my pockets and threw it out while i puked in the bathroom.
Some poor guy found you passed out in a bathroom stall. Again with your dick out. Looks like you got to rage after all.
blew off easter dinner with the fam to go play shot roulette. woke up in nothing but my boxers in the back of a random pickup truck.
I will rip it off your body in ways are socially offensive but you still kind of like.
It's 11:13am and my chem prof is drinking a beer in class. I guess finals week is stressful for them too
My husband gave me a key to his house. I thinks this means we're getting kinda serious.
Look, I tried but his dick tasted like disappointment.
Why is there a whip in the kitchen?
Dude I'm fucking tired of freshman, there are god damn teeth marks on my dick again
No I got a fucking mosquito bite on my vagina. Summer is off to a bumpy start.
Randomize