i know ur right I'm sorry I'm stupid and incompitent look I can't even spell incompetent right! Fuck!
"Morning after" poops are always like, interesting.
So... My dad just saw the Plan B package and the beer cans in my backseat.
Oh its cool I'm sure he already knows you're a whore and an alcoholic.
Drank beer out of a hotwheels bucket all night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dont seek real advice from me tonight cause its always gonna end with we should have sex
just had to take a 4 hour nap to write a one page paper. its obviously the week after winter break.
I am at 2.05 miles in under 11 minutes. So either this thing is broke or I should always work out wasted.
let's just pour the lemonade mix into the soco. cut out the middle man.
She can drink whiskey without a chaser and has a fridge full of whipped cream. Girlfriend potential
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Look at you go. You're like the Slutty Librarian that Could. They should write children's books about you. Children's books for adults.
I am honestly trying to remember his name. All I can remember is that he had a weird mole, a daughter and a lot of cocaine. Please stop letting me pick up at gay night.
Tell him "come over but don't bring a flaccid dick"
Wear something tight
it wasn't a total waste of time; I mean how often do you get to play scotch pong?
.....fair enough
in a meeting in my bathtub while predrinkin for tonight. technology.
Well waking up naked, covered in Chex mix is not how I planned to start my Wednesday if that's what you're getting at.
Randomize