North Korea, Best Korea!
i have a feeling he has a nice dick. i can just sense it.
It was like the Ritz Carlton of jails. I got introduced to our criminal system the right way.
I just five second ruled a donut I dropped at starbucks, everyones staring
sitting in an airport in detroit. just saw a commercial for detroit tourism with kid rock as a spokesman. reason # 1458 to never visit this city.
End of the semester and I banged 14 freshman. I'm like my own welcome to college orientation guide.
Well unless he sent his sperm via fedex, this baby isnt his
Hands down the most disgusting picture message ever received. Thank you.
im here for your entertainment
Some guy dressed like Santa just handed me a bottle of tequila. I NEVER WANT TO LEAVE CANCUN
I legitimately thought I was gonna die getting finger banged to ja rule in the back of your car last night.
I gave the guy a $20 tip on a $9 cab ride, he thought I was just bad at math but I was really just incredibly thankful to be alive and home.
I was like "don't worry, I'm a math major and you deserve the shit out of that 222% tip"
I told you that you should stop drinking and you responded "Thanks for telling me how to live, North Korea!"
I've seen too many dicks in the past week. I can't do it anymore.
You went to pound town last night and chow town this morning. Boy you need a passport.
I just fucked her boyfriend. Happy birthday, bitch.
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