is it gross that my labia hangs so much that guys can't find my clit?
at some point i feel off my bar stool straight into the arms of a gay guy. just my luck.
Our logic class started an hour ago, I walked out and found my sister drunk, sitting down, eating m&ms, afraid to walk in... I want her life
All I remember is this kid kept saying that he has a dream that white kids and black kids can take shots together as one, and just we'd keep drinking to that.
I swear with his long flowing hair and god-like body he looked like Jesus, a bong hitting Jesus
How did "late lunch" turn into 8 solid hours of drinking??? I feel like death.
Just streaked campus for a bottle of patron...maybe you're right...I might have a drinking problem...
He said the pain stops when I get my shit together and stop being a drugged out alcoholic mess. Could have just said no.
Definitely thought about throwing up in the cat box since it's not as far to the bathroom..
Is a swingers hotel appropriate for an anniversary?
Most tragic bathtub-fart of all time. I am going to be late.
The pee I just pissed was about 7% better than the one at your house. But both are pretty far up there.
Grandma is high again and locked herself in the house
yeah, my mom got it for me because it had animals AND alcohol.
I showed up drunk and covered in glitter, smelling like stale booze and dirty stripper and my younger brother gave thanks his life wasn’t a shitshow like mine
That’s how my thanksgiving went
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