Jennifer and I just ate like 4 jello shots w/ a guy dressed as inspector gadget. We are still in the capital building btw
I love Texas.
my grandma was just praying before dinner, and before she could finish my gpa lifted his glass and said 'and here's to avatar!'
I'm starting to think The only feelings I have anymore are drunk and hung over
you can't hurt those
after watching ten minutes of "the decision," I conclude that King Lebron has more influence on America than Barak Obama. I love our countries values.
I just ran up four flights of stairs in heels, im getting an orgasm tonite.
i woke up and the dog was eating spaghetti off my chest.
Your drinking has interfered with your drinking. I bet you could get a scholarship to a rehab. Thats pro-level
isn't that the guy who always buys you drinks?
yeah. i love a man who still buys me drinks after the bar cuts me off.
next time on intervention
I'm a busy girl. All I wanted was noncommittal sex a few times a week
At one point last night I over heard you say " I'm gonna puke in a bag and pour it down your throat" I LOVE YOU.
I gotta figure out which 7 tampons in the box contains the drugs
The inflatable penis from those pics was mine... We broke him that night
Or maybe I'll just keep introducing myself like, hello, they call me iane because I need the D. Applications are submitted online, women need not apply.
He said I gave him the best head he's ever had and I bowed. I BOWED.
I sent my brother over to my ex's to get the rest of my stuff. He comes back SEVEN HOURS LATER, high as fuck without my shit! No loyalty.
Randomize
