Sry I called you an 8
Dont worry, she is sitting right next to me. She is making it clear she wants to scissor
ohhhh fuckk. chicks a dude.
i did the 'picked up item' thing from zelda when i jizzed on her face
so you're single again?
yea but it was worth it
so the time management class we had to take for work seems to be working. I just beat off instead of waiting for gf to get home bc it fit my schedule better.
he was sobbing,drinking his beer, all while confessing his love for her. awkward was an understatement...
I came home drunk to my night light on and a Hershey's bar on my bed. Mom knows me too well.
Apparently i just threw up in the bathroom, i told them i just blew my nose. i don't think they believe me...
you were crying and trying to give advice to people.. that's was a new level of drunk for you
Oh, and I'm only keeping her around till spring. Doing the hunt for cunt is too tough in 12" of snow.
I'm just gonna get real fat and join the circus.
I could not handle jail. And my very angry parents.
She's the perfect storm of great hair, big boobs, intellectualism, and mild moral ambiguity.
My drug dealer was just on ESPN..
If wanting to text you my feelings after three mojitos is wrong I don't wanna be right.
Randomize