I too understand the importance of cheesy bread
ofcourse shes the first one pregnant. wasnt she the one who asked the middle school health teacher how many calories are in sperm?
There is a guy standing at my bar right now wearing an affliction SUIT. I can't wait on him.
After me and my boyfriend broke up I had to resist the temptation to send a mass text to my booty calls saying "thank you for your patience. it will be rewarded."
My sheets, bed, and bathroom are covered in blood. She needed 14 stitches after a trip to ER. This is the last white girl I ever hookup with.
I came home drunk to my night light on and a Hershey's bar on my bed. Mom knows me too well.
THERE IS THE SEXIEST BEARDED MAN HERE. I CAME EVERYWHERE.
nah i think i'm gonna take my landlord's kids trick-or-treating instead. apparently the houses around here hand out wine to the adults and candy to the kids.
I swear some just paged for more cock rings over the intercom.
Will it be a clothes optional week when I get there? I have an amazing outfit of tattoos and toenail polish planned.
Im sorry i offered the man at mcdonalds your hand in marriage in exchange for some french fries
He's going to find out eventually, but really what's he going to do? Cry about it and buy another fucking kitten??
I mean, the night I fell out of that bus I made you pour vodka onto my wound to clean it, then duct taped a paper towel to my hand and kept drinking.
Stop jerking off to vines my recommended list on YouTube is getting weird.
She is crazy bro, she'll kiss me after eating her ass but looses her fucking mind if I double dip a french fry in "our" ketchup!
Randomize
