im going to have to ask you to stop vomiting stars, rainbows, and butterflies all over your facebook statuses...
get home. someone threw up in the fishtank last night.
I pretty much gave up on you when you told me you couldn't go home yet b/c you had to stop at church first. It was 2 AM and you insisted you were late for mass.
I just filled out my 2010 Census drunkenly. I'm single handedly throwing it off.
He just "revenge puked" on her kid. I think we'll be leaving soon.
At the ER. Dropped bottle lead to cut foot which led to me drunk hitting on doctors. Not going well.
I do wanna see you. And we can just lay here and watch a movie and listen to me cry.
I could fuck to npr.
I dare you to find another dealer that delivers bud to your home along with deep fried vegan burritos
You act like tequila is some sort of sex juice
well at least you got laid last nighT. I woke up on a pile of laundry
Today I made my parents proud-spent the afternoon floating around in their pool drinking beer-which I would ask my nephews to get for me out of the fridge
Please god tell me you aren't pregaming your date alone.
How was your day?
Peaceful. I left the house to get paid and get fried chicken.
So bottomless mimosas = me waking up in a truck bed in a random neighborhood with no purse or phone or idea how I got there.
Randomize
