let me know it goes. try not to get bit. and if you can, get someone to videotape it.
They poured beer (3 cans) down the toilet so bubbles can be drunk in fishy heaven
I just found a list in your handwriting titled "Places I've Peed." The National Mall and 'under the second bridge after the bend in the road' are two of the tamer entries. I tip my hat.
So as I left the Australian's hotel room, I said "Welcome to America. You're going to do just fine here."
There should be a rule.......that if you have a small penis you must wear a hat with propellers on it so you can fly the hell off the planet.
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
i gave up on the vacation being fun the night i ate all the marshamallows out of the lucky charms while everyone else was having sex in the condo
Jenna, I'm going to use all my homosexual powers to steal him from you
Austin, I will climb on top of your shoulders and slowly suffocate you with my vagina
He is always putting motivational shit on FB. So its like i know hes sad lonely and looking at internet porn. Break up winning
Every FB picture she has looks like it's from the POV of the guy she's blowing
whoevers yellow car is in your driveway right now... i plan to steal. just an FYI
Lost and found: pink cotton underwear next to my bed and soaking wet Reebok socks or boxers in a plastic bag...in my fridge🤔
I was so drunk I asked my mom if she had always been my mom or if it was someone else for a while
I can get weed and taco bell delivered but frozen peas and a loaf of bread are just too scarce, what the hell is wrong with people?
The ass gains better be worth it
Randomize
