I thought Christmas was going to come before I did
our school mascot just walked into class and threw condoms everywhere. welcome to college
We should see who can shotgun a beer faster over iPhone FaceTime
What is wrong with this kid? He'll take ecstasy but won't take dayquil?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my fake id says im a 34 yr old russian lady ... how is this working
This is the first time since last march I'm gonna be going to a class for more reasons than wanting to bone the girl sitting next to me.
My neighbor asked me to tell you to stop changing in front of their house. Do I even want to know?
officially christened the dorm room by sucking my spilled drink off the floor. tastes like homee
Oh boy. Send him a care package with laxative cookies and alcohol. So he can shit himself while he's passed out drunk.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He referred to our sex as being similar to "Two cheetahs cage fighting" and I have to agree.
If I wasn't stoned and knee deep in cheese and crackers I'd help.
the people next to us at the red light cheered for you while you puked out the window...
Knowing that porn stars want to fall in love is the weirdest thing I've found to be beautiful recently. I'm so lonely.
Damn you. I'm in a bar with Southern Jesus Fearing Blah Blah Rednecks WHO ARE PROBABLY VOTING FOR TRUMP and you go radio silent.
Just ordered a pregnancy test off amazon. Fuck 2019
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