but i really can't criticize. i blacked out waaaaaay ahead of schedule.
Man, ugly runs in her family
yeah, big time
I have a running excel spreadsheet detailing the number of shots in a night and subsequent ability to masturbate
my host sister just stared at me as i knocked over the lamp, then took out all my chocolate, walked into the bathroom, and locked the door. i'm officially the worst exchange student ever.
Im just a social blackout drinker.
Whales. Broccoli little trees giant. Magic in cat form. I want my loco and juice. Black in shower. Brb remember life.
Breaking up as roommates was a poor life decision. I'm sorry. Thank you for never shitting on the floor.
He pulled a condom out of his satchel and i questioned my entire life.
Dinner?
YES CON MARGARITAS POR FAVOR!!!! MUCHO MARGARITAS!!!
My roommate said I banged on the wall and said, "this dude eats pussy like a champ."
Bro my mom is in for two days and you can't even hold back on the drinking she said as she left i hope he doesn't always pee his pants and he is sure popular with the girls wtf
I AM CRUING IT IS 93:2 AM AND I AM CYGIN INT BED
Sneaking the vodka in was the easy part.. listening to medley of puking in the porta pottys was not
But he has cupcakes AND I'm guaranteed an orgasm. .. I feel like I shouldn't even have to actually make a decision here.
Is it bad I use my AA meeting to hookup with guys?
Randomize
