He bought me ice cream and then I gave him a bj
I think that's fair trade off
i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
The only good thing about ohio is that i can get 2 half gallons of soco for 40 bucks
My mom just blew pot smoke into my nose and called me a cat.
Also pregame at mine tomorrow?
Just saw ur booking photo. Love that u were already wearing orange. Its like u knew
I still don't know why you took that job... it sounds miserable
not having any beer money sounds even more miserable
If she doesn't judge me for bringing my vibrator in the tanning bed, I know she is a true friend.
There's a homeless man outside the bar. I have a toothbrush and toothpaste in my car. I think i'm going to give them to him. And they said drinking is bad.
You're so thoughtful.
I had to talk to the cops at my front door in a bathrobe, with the buttplug still in.
Send help, water and tortillas.
If he gets me coffee, cold or no I'll make him see Jesus with my mouth.
So let me get this straight I was getting drunk with our science teacher from high school and you got drunk with an 82 year old woman who invited you back to her house and made you sandwiches.
Yes.
i don't care if you are my best friend. does not give you the right to describe how well my sister gives blowjobs.
how about your cousin?
So uh. Your future in porn. Would you be willing to wear an alien costume for it?
He graduated. He’s not my GA anymore. He’s just the 24 year old that’s helping me put a sexless marriage in the rear view mirror by exploring the Kama sutra with me
Randomize
