People are allowed to visit it's just they can't be from Germany and have to wear masks.
I was on top riding him and his friend walks in and watched for a minute before he realized what was going on
My 10 year old brother handed me a pack of condoms and said "here, i don't wanna be an uncle yet."
You kept spitting the skittles out cause you said they tasted like "balls of sandpaper"
It's sad that my net worth at the moment is 4 beers
You drank everything last night. It was like this huge deconstructed long island that went on for 5 hours
I gave an inspirational speech to a bum and called a bride ugly at her wedding reception.
She makes walking on a treadmill look like a porno. I wish I could send over shots as an ice breaker.
That's effing brilliant. We should start a business.
it says 'tasty bitch' in sharpie on my tits...
I told her I didn't have a condom. She then sized me with her thumb and finger and tossed me a large. Then I asked her to marry me.
Well, during the ride home I had to personally apologize to both of her breasts.
He hasn't touched a vagina in two and a half years. THIS IS WAY TOO MUCH PRESSURE TO BE UNDER
man sorry about that. It's like god was willing me to be an asshole. I haven't filled my quota for the day
There's a bull to ride and dancing on the bar is encouraged. This is my heaven. And this is why god made leopard tube tops.
Omg I'm having dinner at chilli's with a guy who is arguing that getting a weed leaf tatoo on his neck will prevent him from getting a job as a dental assistant
Well that actually sounds reasonable
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