Helping a hot freshman girl move in = 2 hours of my life One bottle of cheap vodkas = $10 Watching her do the walk a shame on her first morning away from home = Priceless
they started a semi-successful rumor that toby keith died. who says fraternities don't have goals
just drew up plans to mow my front lawn into the American flag for world cup. that high and patriotic.
All I could understand from his text was "hatchet" "soccer" & "bitch". its safe to say andy has had enough to drink & will be violent soon
you made sure to tell everyone that the amount of people you had slept with was actually quite low, especially when the size of your breasts was taken into account
Seriously. He was just sitting there naked in the dark with a boner pissed that I came home late.
Took "drink until he's cute" to a whole new level last night...
i don't know what body building stuff he's on, but his cum is basically a 5 hour energy shot.
Congrats! Its a fuck boy!
I cannot belive our party caught on fire
I was eating pickles straight from a jar, contemplating doing something productive. What did I miss?
I wasn't that gone.
Dude, you cried and said how sorry you were when we asked why you had the dip.
I am convinced you could sleep through the apocalypse and only wake up because youre hungry & want Dominoes
And he kept lifting up his shirt every few minutes to check if his nipples were still there
you woke up this morning in a laundry basket, only wearing rainboots.
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