she was on her period so I asked if she wanted to make ass babies
I had to move some guys boxers out of the dryer. This is the closest I'll be getting to dick this month.
running the faucet water is not hiding the sound of you vomiting. fyi.
I think the main reason you were throwing up so much was the quart of soap you chugged trying to burp bubbles. you came close
We were just talking bout putting on helmets and going fo a car ride just to see how ppl react. I will def fit in here haha
The gay viking and his eqyptian 'queen' hooked up on our couches. They pushed them together to make a bed. Innovative, but awkward to come home from work to at 7 am.
She looked at my cock with a kind of resigned disappointment.
Just so we're clear this time around: This is dinner with my FAMILY. Not an opportunity for you to drink too much, and use the word "dick-thumpin" in casual conversation.
My liver just had a heart attack.
Only Jon could get an entire commuter train to chant "Ride! Jon! Home!" to get a girl in bed.
This is what we get for finishing a whole box of Franzia by ourselves
You have a husband. I have a bag full of electronics. This, is the single life.
we had sex in his office so i figured it was appropriate to like his company's page on facebook
I am pants-free in the living room. This is liberating.
I just had 3 numbers I don't know text me and remind me I am to attend AA on monday. Im gonna say it was a good night.
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