you're like a bully in the Christmas story
Oh. They ARE dating. Kinda sad. Have such an urge to be a huge bitch and steal him but my morality is in the way. FUCK YOU MORALITY.
giving him head while hes talking to his fiancee on the phone about inviting me to their wedding.... im invited. should i go or would that be wrong?
they duct taped my keg cup to my hand with my sister's phone number on it. I should be ok tonight.
Every day I regret the life decisions that led me to bank management and NOT being a coke addicted stripper. Every. Single. Day.
well my dad not being home definitely made it less awkward to walk in carrying the bra I left wearing.
i jsut feel off the bus, but its ok the driver let me back on. a woman hid her baby from me..
what part of what i said meant "bring a bowl"
"bouncy castle"
I'll come out for a little. I can't be visibly hungover at work again or I get written up and fired. And yes, I am aware of how alcoholic that sounds.
She's just so happy...and so naked.
Didn't get carded at the bar. We're getting wasted and then walking over to Bass Pro Shops to watch the indoor ducks swim around. And possibly buying a tent.
Pregnancy has ruined porn for me. I can't watch a hot chick get it on without being jealous of her perfectly waxed shit. I can't even see my shit.
I have a few Facebook friends I only keep around for quality control purposes on Tinder
i was really depressed when i left the health dept this morning after i had to write a higher number next to "partners" than "age"
So the vodka/tequila mix went down fine but the burp made me cry
Randomize
