I work with a guy that has a strong spanish accent. He just said "I have a plethora of ..." and I busted out into laughter b4 he finished his sentence b/c it reminded me of 3 amigos.
true best friends attempt to put quarters in each others butts. Thanks for the best birthday ever!
Is it weird i consider You Sexy Thing our song?
let's put it this way: i'm gonna stop drinking and get a gym membership. she's that hot
There was a community pot of Ramen, and if you were in the pool you were either fully clothes or ass naked.
all i could think about while he was eating me out was how pretty his eyelashes were
im that hungover where parking at red lights has to be done
Pictures of drunk me in a bike helmet are like McDonald's collectible toys. There's sooo many, but NO ONE has seen all of them.
Did I run away from you last night?
Yeah it was a great moment for our friendship
My homemade mace ate through its aluminum container. I make awesome mace.
I am just glad I was home to catch most of it, cause it smells BAD.
I'm not a scientist but that could be because it's homemade mace. That is however just a hypothesis
all I know is this drummer better stop eye fucking me while he plays cowbell. it is way too early for that.
I know I've become a responsible adult because this time, I'm not going to do the drugs I found on the ground
My lighter is stuck in my beard.
I just wanted to personally thank you for throwing clementine slivers at me across the room while we made out
If sleeping with your boss doesnt scream job security i dont know what does.
Randomize
