i convinced her i was a yoga teacher by showing her some warm-ups my high school track coach made up
You are the worst substitute drug dealer ever
What would you do in exchange for having a girl eat a waffle house waffle off your body?
1. Are there men involved 2. Is there food involved 3. Do I have to put pants on 4. Do I have to leave this bed
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Nope my penis exudes pure oxygen in times of crisis.
Next time we smoke don't let me talk. I just said something and it sounded like I was speaking in hashtag.
that's where you went wrong. never assume I'm adult enough to do something on my own.
"I'm looking more at his dick bulge." Never thought I'd hear those words come out of my boyfriend's mouth.
American Eric just peed on us from the second floor. Hes now very confused as to why his "toilet is yelling." Send help.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He also complimented my butt. High praise coming from a boob guy.
I'm glad there seems to be a general consensus regarding your ass
My entire grocery store purchase consisted of Little Debbie snacks and Budweiser
Helped a guy at work today that did nothing but stare at my chest....safe to say the Girls were looking G.O.O.D. today.
She asked what the dent on the hood of my car was from..i think she knows we had sex up there
That ass isn’t going to eat itself.
He's so drunk that he's ignoring me and just doing what my cat does.
Oh god he's trying to eat cat food... I don't know if I should stop him or continue laughing....
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