dude on moped wearing crocs...somebody get this guy his man card back
I just applied for an unsubsidized loan naked. I love the internet.
I never said you were fat, just too fat for ME
Sex tip #67: Jizz in the eye is very near the equivalent to pepper spray. Not recommended for pleasure enhancement.
Thanks for getting me home last night.
No worries. I'll always be there for you, just like Mufasa.
I told her she has a very organized vagina; somehow she took offense.
he told me he was a chubby chaser.. then winked. i'm signing up for a gym pass as we speak
Nothing says I've got my life together like vomiting on the groom and passing out at your youngests sisters wedding
When you mimic motorboating Jennifer Love Hewitt, is it really that hard to understand why no one thinks you're straight?
Woke up in your shoes. Please tell me you woke up in mine
It is officially settled in my mind that fuck the hot grad student is THE goal this year
My mind just played a snippet of me asking to be a Joey and trying to climb into your apron pocket...
Sometimes you've gotta crawl to stay concious
WHY DOES MY BOYFRIEND'S BROTHER HAVE TO BE SO FUCKING HOT
How do I tell this guy that if he does not like the condoms at my apartment, he should bring his own without sounding like a sure thing?
Say it's BYOC night at the beach. And, you are a sure thing. Own it.
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