Texts From Last Night

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  (215): View more from Pennsylvania

  Betty ford says i'm here all night

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  (215): Betty ford says i'm here all night http://tfl.nu/rxoa
  Replies (2) Good night (822) Bad night (455)
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  (502): View more from Kentucky

  Just had to explain to the nurse WHERE I have poison ivy. Great Day

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  (502): Just had to explain to the nurse WHERE I have poison ivy. Great Day http://tfl.nu/ab75
  Replies (13) Good night (1004) Bad night (4791)
• Favorite

  (805): View more from California

  He doesn't make grammatical errors. Even while getting head.

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  (805): He doesn't make grammatical errors. Even while getting head. http://tfl.nu/up5g
  Replies (17) Good night (5910) Bad night (997)
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  (937): View more from Ohio

  Passed out in a rocking chair on her porch. Woke up to the tow truck taking away my car.

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  (937): Passed out in a rocking chair on her porch. Woke up to the tow truck taking away my car. http://tfl.nu/1lh8
  Replies (7) Good night (535) Bad night (1845)
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  (206): View more from Washington

  before we even ate breakfast we'd found an eighth of weed in some old purse she never uses. it was gone by lunch

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  (206): before we even ate breakfast we'd found an eighth of weed in some old purse she never uses. it was gone by lunch http://tfl.nu/cp10
  Replies (14) Good night (2060) Bad night (724)
• Favorite

  (607): View more from New York

  just had a very awkward conversation with the concierge at the hotel, they threw your underwear out

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  (607): just had a very awkward conversation with the concierge at the hotel, they threw your underwear out http://tfl.nu/axwq
  Replies (5) Good night (978) Bad night (608)
• Favorite

  (208): View more from Idaho

  If he comes over tomorrow, im answering the door naked. Simple as that.

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  (208): If he comes over tomorrow, im answering the door naked. Simple as that. http://tfl.nu/eu5z
  Replies (5) Good night (1840) Bad night (383)
• Favorite

  (215): View more from Pennsylvania

  Just smokin in the creek with some deer, they like the smoke, I know.

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  (215): Just smokin in the creek with some deer, they like the smoke, I know. http://tfl.nu/nlx4
  Replies (6) Good night (1577) Bad night (412)
• Favorite

  (206): View more from Washington

  Please. That's just a patriotism boner. I watched Michael phelps win another medal and had to change my underwear.

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  (206): Please. That's just a patriotism boner. I watched Michael phelps win another medal and had to change my underwear. http://tfl.nu/poja
  Replies (9) Good night (1290) Bad night (500)
• Favorite

  (720): View more from Colorado

  We are magical, pot smoking, smart as hell, single as fuck, woodland dolphins.

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  (720): We are magical, pot smoking, smart as hell, single as fuck, woodland dolphins. http://tfl.nu/ctwf
  Replies (6) Good night (1660) Bad night (425)
• Favorite

  (617): View more from Massachusetts

  Don't know why you're always hating on relationships. I've had chocolate pancakes accompanied by a blowjob and a blunt and it's not even 9 am. Time for mid morning shower sex. Enjoy your morning bong bowl alone asshole

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  (617): Don't know why you're always hating on relationships. I've had chocolate pancakes accompanied by a blowjob and a blunt and it's not even 9 am. Time for mid morning shower sex. Enjoy your morning bong bowl alone asshole http://tfl.nu/3dil
  Replies (7) Good night (2462) Bad night (334)
• Favorite

  (814): View more from Pennsylvania

  I was cracking open beer cans, throwing them off the roof, and yelling "FRAG OUT!"

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  (814): I was cracking open beer cans, throwing them off the roof, and yelling "FRAG OUT!" http://tfl.nu/71ex
  Replies (11) Good night (630) Bad night (296)
• Favorite

  (778): View more from British Columbia

  i just called my dad a bottom. he agreed

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  (778): i just called my dad a bottom. he agreed http://tfl.nu/9oqv
  Replies (2) Good night (437) Bad night (380)
• Favorite

  (330): View more from Ohio

  I guess I'm just gonna have to learn to live with the fact that I'm the guy who takes his pants off at the party and tries to start an orgy

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  (330): I guess I'm just gonna have to learn to live with the fact that I'm the guy who takes his pants off at the party and tries to start an orgy http://tfl.nu/vj29
  Replies (4) Good night (634) Bad night (218)
• Favorite

  (651): View more from Minnesota

  Come to my pity party. It's being hosted in my basement. The theme is ambiguously sexual cuddling and wine.

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  (651): Come to my pity party. It's being hosted in my basement. The theme is ambiguously sexual cuddling and wine. http://tfl.nu/yt5n
  Replies (3) Good night (634) Bad night (223)

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