dude my little brother busts into my room last night and yells did you know that grandma is hiding scrambled eggs between her legs
what if cement was really a rainbow color they just secretly paint it grey so as not to distract drivers
are you high?
I really need to stop carrying a flask around with me in my backpack at school..
Aren't you in 8th grade?
9th, but that's not the point.
You told me to hold on because you had to barf like a dinosaur.
So he didn't pull out. And I like flipped out. And the he told me to chill and opened up a drawer full of packs of Plan B and handed me one.......
but then i turned into a human whiteboard because i thought it was a good idea to bring out markers
Gees I domt know what your deal was. You kept looking at Nick and shaking your head frantically and doing a weird motion with your hands
Tgat was the small dick alert
I gave you a lap dance in a bowling alley... And I was Fine?
Guy, there will be accountabilities this weekend that you will need to respond to, or else.
Bring enough bail money and little extra for tacos after
Boobs speak an international language.
BTW my friend remembers her as "the one with the pronounced chin"
So his dick was definitely bigger than it looked in all the pictures he sent my daughter.
somehow I wound up on the floor crying about his beard. then telling everyone I'd give him a "lesbian blowjob".
If you find out what that means, show me.
I am going to bedazzle the shit out of your Basilisk costume.
Randomize