I mean come on, he's the best quarterback in the state and doesn't even know how to put on condom
I say that when we get our grades back we're making a drinking game out of it.
The glockenspiel player has some booze though so hopefully the ride won't be that bad
Out of ice. Vodka+club soda+cut up lime popscicle=I'm an alcoholic genius.
so i don't know how many beers it takes to make a recliner look like a toilet, but that's how many i had.
Just received a visit from the Ghost of Bad Decisions Past. Kind of weird 90% of the flashbacks happened in the same sixteen month span, the rest happened at Taco Bell.
Will the fact that I have 4 boob hickies add to or take away from tonight's outfit?
I just hope when I turn 21, it doesn't tank my entire semester.
He keeps asking the karaoke guy to play let it go from frozen so he can sing it in a falsetto
And your boyfriend doesn't mind you constantly taking pictures of his dick just to freak out your brother?
its more like he's accepted that he can't stop me
last night you told me I had a dark, salty butthole
I have an interview tomorrow! The couple we regularly swing with said I could use them as references. Winning
You shouted "my financial aid just came in, who wants a shot?!" Half the bar followed
On a brighter more disgusting note...... I think I just shart myself but I'm too afraid to find out.
I’m literally naked drinking a beer and I gotta leave in 6 minutes for work lol
Randomize
